#21 Setting Up Healthy Boundaries With Work
Podcast Episode #21
Today on this episode we are going to talk about how you can go about creating more space for your personal and private life, without upsetting or neglecting your work commitments.
Why this topic, and why now: the reason why this topic is so important is because after COVID and with development of smart techology many of us have noticed the WORK / LIFE boundaries have gotten more blurry. And this is one of the things that MOST people, regardless of industry they work in mention first when talking about what is keeping them from THRIVING in their life.
So lets unpack this a bit more and look at what boundaries are, what the 4 specific categories are for work boundaries. And make sure to stay until the end when we talk about how you can get good at setting them without upsetting others - Ill cover that later.
What are boundaries at work?
To make it simple, boundaries at work are limits & regulations that employees establish in a company to set a CLEAR boundary that divides the professional life from the personal life. This is especially made by those in the Human Resources Department, often for the reason of preventing any harassment in the work place.
Types of Boundaries at Work
Specifically, there are four boundaries that you can set at work.
#1 Emotional Boundaries
Setting emotional boundaries means separating your emotions from other people’s. This requires you to identify your emotions in real-time and understand the alternatives, which is difficult. It’s a skill that demands self-awareness and curage to show up for yourself when someone else is making demands. These are skills you can develop with time.
Here are some situations that involve protecting emotional boundaries:
If your colleague is having an outburst, not involving yourself
Not internalizing unjustified anger, blame, or disappointment from someone else
Communicating to your boss how you like to receive feedback
Delivering negative feedback to a team member with firmness and compassion
Communicating with your team about your preferred working and communication style
Not letting work setbacks or someone else’s venting put you in a foul mood or change your outlook
#2 Time Boundaries
A boundary that should be a priority, for everyone, our time is so valuable and should not be waisted and taken for granted. In its essence time boundaries , is about getting clear about work hours, when we are logging on & off. What happens when we step away from your inbox & emails when working hours are over.
But it also includes how much time we dedicate on projects that are priority (or not) how we spend our most productive hours, how long we set aside for meetings and so on and so forth.
#3 Mental Boundaries
This means protecting your mental energy and applying it to the things that matter. Whenever you experience an interruption, solve someone else’s problem, or attend an unnecessary meeting, you waste valuable focus you could direct elsewhere.
Here’s how you can protect your mental boundaries:
Set and stick to your working hours, even if you’re working from home
Work with your manager to get clarity on organizational, team, and individual priorities — then prioritize, ruthlessly
Decline meetings where your presence doesn’t add value
Turn off Slack, social media, and work email notifications while you’re doing deep work
Use your vacation time to disconnect and enjoy the time off
#4 Physical Boundaries
Your physical boundaries involve anything that has to do with your body, bodily health, or physical space. If someone or something encroaches on these boundaries, they’re crossing a line regarding your comfort and safety.
Here are some ways to maintain your physical boundaries:
Offer handshakes instead of hugs
Turn off your webcam during Zoom meetings when you need to
Take sick days and mental health days when you need them with only as much explanation as is required by your company policy
Set and take a lunch break
Now that we know what boundaries we should set, let’s answer the more important question. How do we establish them?
Let’s dive into how you can get started, and look at 3 advice to impliment:
#1 Do the Work Before the Work: Review your job description, identify your own personal values and figure out where the friction point is:
Most frustration happens when a) you feel like you’re loaded with too much tasks that aren’t even in your JD & you aren’t even compensated for. b) when you are asked to do things that is against your personal beliefs or values.
Before we accept a job, you were given a contract, an offer letter & a job description. A good place to start is to go back to your job description & review it. Boundaries begin to set place when you are aware of what you’re supposed to do & what you’re not supposed to do.
Once that is completed, review the list of "have to'dos & tasks" through the spectacle of your own personal values, ask your self what are the friction points I am experiencing. Such as are you being asked to do things that feel like a waist of your time / resources / competence or something that makes you feel uncomfortable.
In either case if you are feeling uncomfortable, you need to communicate with your supervisor, its important to start a conversation & discuss. It’s your right as an employee.
#2 Start Small and Communicate before it’s too late – before the bad habits set in.
Career growth & financial freedom are important, but so are your mental health & emotional well-being. They’re in fact the number one PRIORITY for longevity in your roll. So, its important to learn to communicate what’s okay & what’s not okay with a trusted colleague & strive to contribute to a healthy culture at work. Start small, practice with people who are close to you and expand out in difficulty and reach🙂
#3 Take your time off seriously: And make your life outside work a priority.
When it’s your day off, or outside your work hours, it’s NO WORK day. Think twice before you grab your laptop & sulk in your emails or get stuck in a corrispodance. Ask your self is it REALLY something that can not wait until tomorrow.
You are entitled to enjoy your evenings, rest day & DO OTHER THINGS. If you have a full time job, your job already takes up majority of your time during the work week, and its is your right to not let it take more - and you are allowed to have a life outside work.
Well, these are just a few of what you can do to establish boundaries. A few tips that can help you started. A casual reminder you can’t control the people around you, but you can always control your reaction. Boundaries are a funny thing that feel hard in the beginning but if you stick to them, it gets easier and easier as you go.
- if you want more quick and dirty tips make sure to subscribe to Building Thriving Lifestyles where ever you are listening to this and leave me a review to tell me how I am doing.
